To re-establish an intimate relationship after a hasty but messy break-up requires courage as well as humility on your side so that you can honestly assess the possibilities of winning back an ex-partner who probably is as hurt as you are. Find out if both still keep a hoard of affection needed in undergoing the healing process together. The former partner must be as willing as you are to hold dialogues and to discuss, without ranting, issues that frayed your bond. You’ve got to make sure therefore that both of you are still on the same wavelength.

To begin, express your feelings in a long passionate letter that you might need to deliver personally. Take time to sit down and put in writing all the life-affirming events while you were still a couple. Don’t just wax empty nostalgia but employ objectivity in listing down the positive effects that made you grow within the relationship with the ex-beau. Written words will detail the mistakes and the wrong moves that you made in that relationship. Be humble enough to apologize in writing for the hurtful things that you did. Be humble enough to acknowledge what hurt you and do try to express forgiveness. Then implore in writing for a second chance, beg for the space where you both can try to make things right for once. If straightforward sentences are not your cup of tea, try poetry or hip-hop song. You can even be boldly humorous, if that becomes your personal style.

After you’re back on speaking terms, the next step to bringing your ex back to you is to plan a day together doing something you both enjoy. This will let you see if getting back together is really the best thing for you. Some possibilities of things you might do are seeing a movie, having dinner, or shopping. Think of something you’ve enjoyed doing together in the past where you can enjoy one another’s company.

Try to take some time to talk while spending this time together, don’t be afraid to have fun. If your ex really wants you back, this is a good way to find out because the moments of fun will consume them and remind them of the good times you two are capable of having together. This will open their mind to the thought of being with you again.

Another step in this process is to do something for your ex. If you’re a good cook, fix a romantic supper and invite them over. If you’re crafty, make them a gift from your heart. You can even buy them something you know they’ve been wanting for a long time. This way they’ll know that you’re still thinking of them and that you still care about them. Assuming they still have feelings for you as well, this gesture should make them reconsider reviving the relationship.

So that you don’t have this type of misunderstanding again, communicate with each other. Be sure the ex is clear on what you want from them and also what you will do for them in order to get this relationship back on track. This will tell your ex how sincere you are in your efforts to get them back and help make them want to come back

The main goal in trying to get an ex back is to remain sincere. Keep the door of communication open, let your emotions flow and encourage them to do the same. If you both believe that trying the relationship again is what is best, go for it. Whatever problems led to the break up, vow to work on them and get past them together. Hopefully, in the end, your ex will be convinced that they can be with you, and that there was no real reason to end the relationship in the first place.